Billboard Hot 100 Highlights May 12th, 2018

This is much later than I was hoping to get this out, but real life intervened repeatedly. This is why I listen to these songs in my car now. Also the album art for Beerbongs and Bentleys is crap. Highlights.

Top 20

1. Nice For What by Drake (1)
2. Psycho by Post Malone ft. Ty Dolla $ign (5)
3. God's Plan by Drake (2)
4. Meant To Be by Bebe Rexha ft. Florida Georgia Line (4)
5. The Middle by Zedd, Maren Morris & Grey (7)
6. Never Be The Same by Camila Cabello (13)
7. Better Now by Post Malone (New)
8. Rockstar by Post Malone ft. 21 Savage (32)
9. Look Alive by BlocBoy JB ft. Drake (9)
10. No Tears Left To Cry by Ariana Grande (3)
11. Paranoid by Post Malone (New)
12. Perfect by Ed Sheeran (11)
13. Freaky Friday by Lil Dicky ft. Chris Brown (12)
14. Rich & Sad by Post Malone (New)
15. Spoil My Night by Post Malone ft. Swae Lee (New)
16. Ball For Me by Post Malone ft. Nicki Minaj (New)
17. Stay by Post Malone (New)
18. Walk It Talk It by Migos ft. Drake (18)
19. Mine by Bazzi (17)
20. Same Bitches by Post Malone ft. G-Eazy & YG (New)

Fell Off Top 20

22. I Like It by Cardi B, Bad Bunny & J Balvin (16)
32. Call Out My Name by The Weeknd (19)
42. ATM by J. Cole (6)
44. KOD by J. Cole (10)
48. Kevin's Heart by J. Cole (8)
71. Motiv8 by J. Cole (15)
79. 1985 (Intro To The Fall Off) by J. Cole (20)
80. Photograph by J. Cole (14)

Big Gains (10+)

8. Rockstar by Post Malone ft. 21 Savage (32)
37. Boo'd Up by Ella Mai (55)
43. Dame Tu Cosita by El Chombo (81)
54. Dura by Daddy Yankee (75)
64. Te Bote (Remix) by Casper Magico, Nio Garcia, Darell, Nicky Jam, Ozuna & Bad Bunny (74)

Moderate Gains (5 - 9)

6. Never Be The Same by Camila Cabello (13)

Big Losses (10+)

31. Plug Wank by Rich The Kid (21)
32. Call Out My Name by The Weeknd (19)
42. ATM by J. Cole (6)
44. KOD by J. Cole (10)
48. Kevin's Heart by J. Cole (8)
71. Motiv8 by J. Cole (15)
79. 1985 (Intro To The Fall Off) by J. Cole (20)
80. Photograph by J. Cole (14)
51. Esskeetit by Lil Pump (37)
55. Japan by Famous Dex (35)
60. Sad! by XXXTENTACION (31)
66. King's Dead by Jay Rock, Kendrick Lamar, Future & James Blake (54)
74. Most People Are Good by Luke Bryan (62)
75. Bartier Cardi by Cardi B ft. 21 Savage (60)
78. Say Something by Justin Timberlake ft. Chris Stapleton (65)
82. OTW by Khalid, Ty Dolla $ign & 6LACK (57)
86. Ring by Cardi B ft. Kehlani (71)
88. Zombie by Bad Wolves (76)
89. I Do by Cardi B ft. SZA (70)
91. I Lived It by Blake Shelton (80)
96. Changes by XXXTENTACION (83)

Moderate Losses (5 - 9)

10. No Tears Left To Cry by Ariana Grande (3)
22. I Like It by Cardi B, Bad Bunny & J Balvin (16)
27. Havana by Camila Cabello ft. Young Thug (22)
33. Finesse (Remix) by Bruno Mars ft. Cardi B (25)
49. All The Stars by Kendrick Lamar & SZA (44)
53. Stir Fry by Migos (39)
58. Drip by Cardi B ft. Migos (51)
68. New Freezer by Rich The Kid ft. Kendrick Lamar (61)
76. Singles You Up by Jordan Davis (67)
87. Sit Next To Me by Foster The People (79)
94. El Farsante (Remix) by Ozuna & Romeo Santos (87)
95. Diamond Teeth Samurai by YoungBoy Never Broke Again (89)
99. Alone (Remix) by Halsey ft. Big Sean & Stefflon Don (92)
100. Red Roses by Lil Skies ft. Landon Cube (93)

Dropouts

• The Cut Off by J. Cole ft. kiLL edward (28, 28, 1 week)
• Brackets by J. Cole (30, 30, 1 week)
• Wake Me Up by Avicii ft. Aloe Blacc (34, 4, 54 weeks)
• Window Pain (Outro) by J. Cole (41, 41, 1 week)
• Thunder by Imagine Dragons (45, 4, 52 weeks)
• Friends by J. Cole ft. kiLL edward (46, 46, 1 week)
• Once An Addict (Interlude) by J. Cole (47, 47, 1 week)
• Let You Down by NF (49, 12, 28 weeks)
• Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man (50, 4, 45 weeks)
• Intro by J. Cole (53, 53, 1 week)
• Babe by Sugarland ft. Taylor Swift (72, 72, 1 week)
• Barbie Tingz by Nicki Minaj (78, 25, 3 weeks)
• The Long Way by Brett Eldredge (85, 65, 12 weeks)
• This Is Me by Keala Settle & The Greatest Showman Ensemble (91, 58, 14 weeks)
• Moonlight by XXXTENTACION (94, 35, 6 weeks)
• Cry Pretty by Carrie Underwood (96, 48, 2 weeks)
• Close by Rae Sremmurd ft. Travis Scott (98, 98, 1 week)
• Thru Your Phone by Cardi B (99, 50, 3 weeks)
• Best Life by Cardi B ft. Chance The Rapper (67, 39, 3 weeks)

Returning Entries

34. Candy Paint by Post Malone

New Entries

7. Better Now by Post Malone
11. Paranoid by Post Malone
14. Rich & Sad by Post Malone
15. Spoil My Night by Post Malone ft. Swae Lee
16. Ball For Me by Post Malone ft. Nicki Minaj
17. Stay by Post Malone
20. Same Bitches by Post Malone ft. G-Eazy & YG
23. Zack And Codeine by Post Malone
24. Over Now by Post Malone
29. Takin' Shots by Post Malone
40. 92 Explorer by Post Malone
46. Otherside by Post Malone
47. Blame It On Me by Post Malone
57. Sugar Wraith by Post Malone
62. Famous by Mason Ramsey
73. Jonestown (Interlude) by Post Malone
77. Overdose by YoungBoy Never Broke Again
85. Ye vs The People by Kanye West ft. T.I.

New and Returning Entries Ranked

1. Over Now

Not only is this the best song of the week, this is the best song I think Post Malone will ever make. Seriously, this is so raw and cathartic, and all he had to do was add a little bit of guitar. His pain connects more here than it does on any other song on the record, and his vocal effects actually sound awesome. Sure, the lyrics are pissy, especially that "I'mma put that pussy in a bodybag" line, which is ridiculously emo and memetic, that feels like the point. Incredible stuff. Seriously.

2. Stay

Post Malone with an acoustic guitar? Run for the hills! Or don't. Because this is good. Acoustic guitar songs are a good way to highlight regret and sadness, and it's done well here. It doesn't really resemble your typical WGWAG song despite its setup. It feels more like Post's typical shtick, just stripped back and without gimmicks. It's easy to vibe to and enjoy. And it hits harder than, well, almost any other track on the album.

3. Candy Paint

The album bomb helped this song get even higher than it had before. Ideally it'd get a second chance altogether but I don't think that's gonna happen. Shame, cause it's still pretty good. Even though I obviously don't consider it the best song from the album.

4. Famous

I've passively avoided everything related to the Yodel Kid on the internet. Don't really care that much. That being said, this is surprisingly good. No matter what I wasn't gonna be too hard on Mason since he's only 11. But to my surprise, he's got some promise. Sure he's high pitched and squeaky, but he's still charming and charismatic despite that, and it fits really well in the authentic country lane he's going in. And the lyrics are sweet enough. Mostly about wanting to be with a girl. Even though he's 11. Eh, crushes happen. Plus I highly doubt he wrote much of this himself. But hey, it exceeded my expectations. I wish you the best, kid.

5. Ball For Me

This album's dance song, and not a bad one. It's bouncy, even if the chorus is kinda choppy. Post sounds like he's having fun, especially with that cooing he's doing and his general energy. Nicki Minaj's verse isn't particularly special but it isn't awful either. Really I wish this production was more expressive. The warbling synths feels more segmented than they should for this type of pump-up track. If this had similar arrangements to the club songs of the early 2010s, this would be even better. And I can't believe I'm saying that...

6. Overdose

Did YoungBoy just decide to be good now? Or at the very least tolerable? Because yeah, I dig this. The beat's minimalist but effective with the tense pianos and gurgling bass, and it's able to mask YoungBoy's nasal delivery fairly efficiently. And YoungBoy himself can be chilling in a few spots. So yeah, I see improvement. Either that or people are gravitating to better stuff from the guy. Either way, I approve of this.

7. Sugar Wraith

One of the catchier songs on Beerbongs and Bentleys. Mostly due to that bleepy synth melody combined with the usual ethereal vocal effects that are all over this record. It's chilled out and fun to listen to for that. Plus there's novelty in the namedrop to Anthony Fantano. Who ended up liking this record more than he probably should've. Eh. Opinions. This isn't bad.

8. Zack and Codeine

This is a really, really stupid title for a song. I've already expressed that on Twitter. As for the song itself, it's alright. Basically an upbeat celebration track and drugs are involved, of course. But it's kinda infectious. I have no real gripes with any one part of it, even if it's a /little/ derivative for Post Malone. But good nonetheless.

9. 92 Explorer

All things considered, I think the chorus is the only part of this song that really jells with me. Mostly because the "ooh, baby ooh" bit is pretty infectious, as is that Weeknd-esque flow that caps off the last two bars in it. Otherwise I think the percussion is really blocky and messy and I don't like it. Rest of the beat is okay though, if forgettable.

10. Jonestown (Interlude)

It's weird when songs that are only meant to be listened to with the rest of the album chart. Which is probably why this charted way lower than every other song on the album, but still. I guess it's not a bad interlude. It's visceral and junk, and clearly meant to be more of a fragment than a real song. Whatever, it'll be gone next week. I don't need to expend much thought on it.

11. Same Bitches

Probably the biggest example of Post's shitty attitudes toward women on this album. The most telling line in the song is where Post asks the girl he's talking to if her dad's rich like him. Like, what business do you have asking that? Other than that, it's the most rap-leaning song on the album, with a beat that I feel needs more menace to work. YG's verse pretty much falls apart, but I did actually enjoy G-Eazy's verse. Yes I have a problem, I know. But his attitude and delivery fit the beat better than the other two performers. So he saved the song from being even worse in my eyes.

12. Paranoid

Like with the case of Psycho, I'm not sure the title or theming really matches how the song sounds. It's pretty spacey and ethereal, not really showcasing any tension or dread. And there are songs on this album that do go for that tone, so I don't know what the issue was here.

13. Spoil My Night

A song that Swae Lee pretty much dominates, for better or for worse. Even when he's not the one singing. His voice doesn't really work as well as it should for this, because his performance is too willowy. And that only highlight's Post's performance as overpowering and a little much to take in. Especially when he admits he doesn't know a girl's face because he was distracted by her "beautiful boobies". Charming? I do kinda like the main melody, but it's played with a little more menace than I think it needs.

14. Better Now

This song rubs me the wrong way. Probably because of the pissiness of the lyrics that Post can't really back up here. The beat isn't really that bombastic, it's just Post yelling about how his ex and him think they have it better because they broke up. I mean, so? That's such a vague statement you're trying to make. And such an unpleasant song that I don't understand how it's the highest debut this week. Seriously? I'd stick with Over Now.

15. Otherside

This song barely exists. It basically relies on its percussion to exist, and it doesn't even have that most of the time. Post's yelling doesn't feel cathartic, it just feels empty with nothing to really back it up. Only thing that really sticks out to me are a couple vocal melodies in the chorus. One that reminds me of Written In The Stars by Tinie Tempah, and one that reminds me of Dust In The Wind by Kansas. Both better songs. I'll forget this by the end of the night.

16. Takin' Shots

Like Otherside, this just doesn't feel finished. The beat feels like it's all ether, with no real melody to anchor it. Any flow Post tries that ends up working feels coincidental. Also that "Brrrrrrrah" part is really annoying. And the only part of this song that's easy to remember. Pass.

17. Blame It On Me

I feel like this is supposed to be the I Fall Apart of the album. In that it feels unfinished and is an insufferable breakup ballad. Now it's not as unlistenable as I Fall Apart, but it's still pretty worthless to me. Downright ugly all around, with a performance that's more robotic than human. How are you gonna make me feel emotions when your emotions sound fake? Think about that.

18. Rich & Sad

I think it should be an unwritten rule that you make a breakup song about being sad also sound sad. This song's tone is so confused. I don't know what mood it's supposed to convey, but it's obviously the wrong one. And the phrase "I just keep wishing that the money made you stay" is absolutely infuriating to me. It feels like an open admission that your attitudes toward women are terrible and they could only care about you because you're rich and famous. But lemme guess, you don't like gold diggers, right? God, what an unpleasant song.

19. Ye vs The People

Kanye, you're a fucking moron. Okay, so, beat's okay. I like the opulent vocal samples Ye does from time to time. But just...he has no idea what he's talking about here. Essentially building T.I. up as a strawman so that he can more easily attack the people blasting him for his (frankly blind) support of Donald Trump. And he's bad at countering even those softballs! He gives no real details, just redundant jargon about how black people don't need to be Democrats or how he's trying to start up a dialogue of new ideas. No. I refuse your poorly thought out, shoddy, and dangerous politics. No. Go in the corner and put away your phone, Kanye. And T.I., you should be ashamed for having taken part in this ego trip.